Dyied and curled
The worst one was when I was in the mosque and I had a niqab on and some guy thought I was his WIFE and was like come on I parked the car a few roads away so we have to walk
I walked for a minute and then realised I wasn’t married
Stop reblogging my shame
Ah, Bisexuality Day, when Freddie Mercury visits all the bisexuals who’ve been good the past year and gives them presents
Ha ha, I can’t believe you still think Freddie Mercury is real. Everybody knows it’s really your parents.
IT IS FREDDIE. I’VE SEEN HIM! HE COMES TO YOUR HOUSE AND LEAVES YOU OSCAR WILDE BOOKS AND MARLON BRANDO MOVIES.
내가그렸는데도 이그림의 의미를 모르겠다
mom: amazons flying delivery drone is here with your package
me: what the fuck
my dad just yelled up the stairs “CHLOE DID YOU KNOW THE WEATHERMAN WAS GAY I DIDNT KNOW HE WAS GAY HE JUST GOT MARRIED TO HIS BOYFRIEND” and i was like which weatheman are we talking about here and he said “THE BLONDE ONE WITH THE SHARP HAIR CUT AND THE TIGHT PECS AND THE HOT ASS BODY” dad is there something you want to tell me
MMM WHATCHA SAAAAAYYYY
plucking your eyebrows is legitimately very stressful because you pull out one wrong hair and it’s game over